Kaia, the dork child
Since hubby didn't have to work yesterday, we got to talk to him online for 3.5 hours last night. It was great! Kaia would not stop talking (she was acting like she was talking directly to him and I would type out what she was saying). Man, it was hilarious. She had us in stitches with some of the stuff she was coming up with.
I just had to give you a little sample of some of her silliness last night...mind you, I typed what she said word for word (and she talks fast and she talks a lot like I do, so it's a good thing I type really fast):
ME: Kaia was just telling me something really funny right before you got online
DH: OH yeah?
ME: she says "yuck...I don't like that minty thing" and I said "what minty thing" and she says "some pink minty thing...it was yucky so I spit it out"
ME: so, I'm here thinking she licked her pink minty soap that came with her Minty My Little Pony bath set that I got her for Christmas (from you), so when I ask her again "what pink minty thing" she says "I don't know...it was in the popcorn bowl" and "it was just some pink minty thing"
We have webcams that we use most of the time when we're talking and especially if Kaia's awake (he's usually online late at night when she's in bed)...he'd just taken a drink and set it in front of the webcam by mistake...
KAIA: Daddy, what is that Daddy?
DH: my Gatorade
DH: it's a drink
KAIA: Oh. Daddy I can't see you. Daddy, I can see you now. Daddy who's that befront of you? You're fired! (I swear that she has never seen The Apprentice, so she must have picked this up at school)
DH: It's another soldier (his webcam screen goes black here)
KAIA: I can't see Daddy. I think it's way too dark! Daaad turn the lights on! Where did you go, Daddy? I mean it, turn the lights on!
DH: there...now can you see me?
KAIA: Yes Daddy.
DH: Nice flag (she was twirling around an Iraq flag that he sent to Kaia for Christmas)
Kaia: Oh Daddy, thank you for my flag...the flag that you made for me...that was so nice, Daddy.
DH: You're welcome...I'm glad you like it!
KAIA: (as she puts the flag over her face) I just covered my face...oh great...I just got a headache...now I cant see
DH: you're silly
KAIA: No I'm not Daaadddddyyyy! You are a nut! Look at the flag I made. That's what my teacher did Mommy because it was Saturday and it's Tuesday. (what the ?)
DH: Oh you made the flag? I thought I made the flag!
KAIA: (singing) Roll up the flag, roll up the flag...too much every day! You are covered in frosting! You are covered up into a flag!
KAIA: (speaking) Ha! It's just me Dad. I didn't say that Daddy, sorry. Daddy I just made you cookies...it's in the kitchen, so I better make a cookie fast...and that's how it's finished. (we made cookies like 2 weeks ago)
KAIA: (she's spotted a tag from a My Little Pony toy and holds it up to the webcam) just getting hte words from my little pony - A Very Minty Christmas - and then the candy cane broke...that's not very nice at all...and then a unicorn said something. It was a magic pony called Minty and then the person said "I know...I promise" and then she said "I know what monkey is jumping on the bed"
DH: was that what she ate? lol
KAIA: Minty...stop talking...just let me do the story mommy. I have a boo boo to get that voice out...there we go..then you cannot talk! never talk! that was mommy and her grandpa horse!
KAIA: (holding up a chime ball from when I was a baby) Daddy...this is my mommy's baby ball, but I found my mommy's clock in the other room. But it was the same match...a horse and another horse and a goose and another goose (there are 2 horses and 2 geese across from each other in the chime ball). When it turns...the sky...then I'll say you and me and a shiny tree (channeling Marty from Rock Star: INXS?)
KAIA: This question is called Minty Minty Minty Christmas...and a happy new year!
She is too funny...and then she started getting crazy...
KAIA: (singing) crown crown crown..I love my favorite crown...it's a juicy crown! a juicy crown...a juicy crown
DH: Put it on! I want to see your crown.
KAIA: look at this juicy crown! look at this juicy crown! look at this crown it's a juicy crown! a j j j j j j j j juicy crown
DH: what kind of juice is it?
KAIA: fruit berry juice. I mean roni juice...it's a roni juice
KAIA: Hey...I didn't say what kind of juice! which kind of juice daddy? (Kaia then asked me "What did daddy say?" and I said "he didn't say anything yet because you are still talking")
KAIA: Oh, snap!
KAIA: Mom, I gotta spell Oh, snap!
DH: can you spell it for me?
KAIA: (typing) osnp (she sounds it out...I asked her "Is that right...is that how you spell "oh snap"?)
KAIA: No! Hey...I'm missing a vowel! "A" - how about "A". (typing) osnap
Then she spots a porcelain doll holding a book with a '6' on it (one of those old birthday dolls...it was mine when I turned 6) sitting on my desk...she thinks she's holding a book with music...
KAIA: watch my song. I'm doing the rest of the song. (I say "I don't have to hear the rest right now, we're talking to daddy)
KAIA: Yes you do...it's the rules, Mom! WHen I poke the picture, I make a sound, when I ding the plate I make a sound (she's tapping the image of her dad on the screen with the flag's pole, which she's using as a conductor's baton)
KAIA: I'm making people happy because they like to sing (now she starts tapping the doll, so I tell her to stop cause she will break...she sulks and says 'sorry'...then comes back with a piece of paper that she's rolled up like a baton)
KAIA: Hey...excuse me...I want you to move! See I won't break her! See, I promise!
(then she starts making the doll sing Old McDonald, but she sings it incorrectly)
KAIA: Hey...not quite! Uh oh, it won't be right! Please Prairie Dawn, sing it right right (she's apparently pretending the doll is the musically inclined Prairie Dawn from Sesame Street, so I start laughing)
KAIA: Hey...shhhhhh be quiet to her music. That is rude. (I say sorry...she says 'shhhhhh' to me typing and I say I am telling daddy what she's saying)
KAIA: Well, just type it quietly please...so I can hear the music! I'm reducting you know. No more talking! (she's tapping the baton like a conductor). Mommy my reductor is not right...Mommy it's too short! Mommy make it right (I fix her curled up paper to make it longer)
KAIA: I'm reducting Mommy..remember the rules, Mommy...it's the rules!
KAIA: (to the doll) DOn't sing that way so my mommy won't laugh at you...scoot down...scoot down! I said scoot. Don't break by yourself, okay? I want to be the reductor, okay? So go ahead...I tap tap tap and you scoot scoot scoot. (she wants me to move the camera so Daddy can see the doll singing)
And finally, her story...
KAIA: Once upon a time there was a princess named Andrea and then she was proud and very smart. And then she looked at the camera and then she said oh my! what do you say? I don't know...oh that gives me a headache! move her move her...what..you're readinga story silly! ah...chooo! I just said something in this sticker I mean...and then I looked in the sweetest crackers and I play with ronis and then I stepped on a costume piece and then I stepped on the costume and then I say aaahhh that was so scary and then she looked at the camera and said never ever ever and then she stepped on the spoon and said NO MORE HAIRS and then she stepped on the see saw and then she stepped on that and then she bonked her head and then she looked and she was falling...then she was not falling...THE END
LMAO! My daughter is the biggest dork ever. She cracks me the hell up. SHe's so damn creative and silly. The other day, she was lying in my mom's bed watching cartoons while my step-dad and I were in the living room watching Lost. She told my mom to ask her questions. She said "Grandma...ask me ____ okay?" and then when my mom would ask the question, she'd say "Hey...Grandma...stop talking to me...don't you see I'm trying to sleep". She did that like 3 or 4 times.